I haven't blogged in ages so I thought I'd talk about something that has been playing on my mind and something I'm constantly reminded of by people who are ignorant to the fact that their words and views are actually having an effect on me even though they are probably in the same position. Today I'm going to be talking about life and the question of what am I going to do with mine.
So I'm nineteen years old and I've been out of education for a year and a bit. Since then I've been working jobs I don't really want, just so I can get some money and through the process of doing this work try and work out what I wanted to do with my life. Now in today's society it's expected that after school or college that teenagers go to university and from there get degrees and then get a great job that pays amazing and you then get married, have children and die with your husband or wife by your side, and that's how life is meant to be. However, if you choose to get a job after school and don't go into further education then you're a bit of a misfit, a fail, someone who will live with their parents till their thirty, won't make new friends and lose touch with old ones, someone who will have to put up with the bad pay because they can't get another job, a job they might actually want because they aren't qualified or haven't been given a chance, someone who will wake up when they are fifty and ask themselves what did I do with my life because they were asked when they were sixteen to decide what they were going to do with their lives. The thought that might happen to me is terrifying.
And this thought is fueled by people who go to university or distant family members who constantly ask me, 'So what you doing with your life Grace?, Got your dream job? Worked out what you're going to be doing for the rest of your life?' No I haven't realised what I'm doing with my life because for starters I'm young, I'm not going to decide what i'm doing with my life at this age because in two years time, I might change my mind. Another reason is how some of the people saying this to me are people who went to university because 'I thought that's was what you're meant to do' and didn't actually want to go, so they are just as clueless as me except they will be in a shit load of debt. Now I'm not saying university is a bad choice, it really isn't, I just feel if you don't really know what you want to do then don't go because you feel you need to or because you feel you should get a degree under your belt.
I'm sure everyone in their life has had this crippling thought but I feel that something needs to be done about it, more opportunities and less judgement from older people who have their life together or people who point me out and say to their young children, 'Do well in school so you don't end up like her'. Yes, I have two jobs which I don't mind doing, not my favourite thing to do but at least I'm doing something and trying to work out what i'm doing with my life.
Rant ended.
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